"Good evening America, and welcome to Management Roundtable's new game show, 'Who Wants to be a Heavyweight Product Manager?' A trumpet fanfare fills the room. "Alright, let's go to our game. We have our first contestant, Tim Smith, a mechanical engineer from an automotive company in Aurora, Illinois. Tim, are you ready to play?"

"Yes I am, Alex. I've been preparing for this my whole life."

"That's very sad, Tim. America pities you. Just a reminder about the rules, there are 8 questions between you and the position of heavyweight product manager for our next generation product line. Each right answer moves you up a level in the organization. The company wants to see how knowledgeable you are about product development before it invests in you. Remember, you have three lifelines: the 50/50, you can ask the audience, or you can call anyone in America to ask for help. Are you ready for the first question?"

"I am ready, Alex."

"For the position of field service technician, answer the following question:

"What is the most common term for the person that remits monetary units for a good or service that you provide.  Is it:

A) Sucker
B) Customer
C) Manager; or
D) Client"

Tim smiled confidently. "Believe it or not, I've actually met one of these people before, Alex. So I'm going to say B-Customer."

"You're certain about that, Tim?"

"Positive, Alex."

"B - customer." Alex's face grew serious. "Your final answer?"

"My final answer," said Tim, still smiling.

"That's correct," Alex confirmed. "You've reached the position of field service technician. Let's keep moving. Our next question, for the position of shop floor operator:

"Which of the following is not a tool for lean production.  Is it

A) Kanban
B) Pikachu
C) Heijunka; or
D) Poka Yoke"

"I know this one," said Tim. "Let's see now. Kanban is inventory management. I know poka yoke is mistake proofing. I'm not sure about C, but Pikachu - I think that's a Pokemon character, so I'll say B - Pikachu."

Alex looked at him skeptically. "Confident?"

"I am 99.89% sure."

"B - Your final answer?"

"My final answer. B. Yes."

"You're right - Pikachu is a Pokemon character, so you've reached the level of shop floor operator. Your next question is a "stage-gate" question, which means if you answer correctly, you will be guaranteed the position of sales associate. Right now you still have all 3 lifelines left. There are 6 questions remaining between you and the product manager's job. Your next question is:

A) Operational Expense
B) Throughput
C) Activity-Based Costing; or
D) Inventory"

Tim sighed nervously. "I should know this, but I'm not sure. I read "The Goal" a few years ago, but my company hasn't embraced any of it. I'm pretty sure 'throughput' and 'inventory' are right, but the last one...I'd just have to guess. I'm gonna have to use a lifeline. Can we call my friend, Jonah, he should be able to help me."

"Alright," said Alex. "We'll get AT&T to call up Jonah, let's hope that he's home," a dialing phone can be heard in the background, then a click.  "I believe we have him on the line now. Hello--Jonah?"

"Yes, this is Jonah?"

"It's Alex Cooper calling from MRT's 'Who Wants to be a Heavyweight Product Manager.'"

"What the…? How did you get this number?"

"Your friend Tim is here, trying to win himself a big promotion, but he's in a bit of trouble and needs your help."

"Tim?  Figures. Okay, put the meathead on. But make it quick. I have a plane to catch."

Tim reads Jonah the question.

"You called me for that?" Jonah exclaimed. "Think about it. One of these things is not like the other. One of these things is not the same. Remember the saga of Unico, Tim. To fix things they had to first forget about all the traditional ways they measured performance. Traditional metrics are the enemy of the goal. I will not tell you the answer. Because I suspect you have known it all along.  Farewell, my friend, and good luck." Jonah hangs up.

"Quite a surly fellow," remarked Alex.

"Indeed," agreed Tim. "And not much help, either. But let me see. He said you had to give up traditional metrics. I'm still not sure, but I'll venture a guess. I'm going with C - Activity Based Costing."

"Activity Based Costing. Your final answer?"

"Yes, Alex. Final answer."

"Jonah helped you more than you think, Tim. C is correct!"  Dramatic music blasts through the studio.  Tim lets out a breath of relief.  "Congratulations, you're a sales associate. Remember, you are guaranteed this position, even if you get a wrong answer. You can also quit at any time, or keep going for the top prize. What do you want to do?"

"I can't even get my kids to eat their vegetables, Alex, so I know I'd be really bad in sales. I could really use a product manager's stock options. I'm going to keep going."

"Alright, good decision. The next question will earn you the level of manufacturing engineer if you answer correctly. Your question is:

"Which of the following books was not written by MIT's Michael Cusumano?  Is it:

A) Competing on Internet Time
B) Thinking Beyond Lean
C) Microsoft Secrets; or
D) Killer Ap"

Tim cleared his throat. "I really need to read more...

"I read Microsoft Secrets, that's a great book, so I know he wrote that one. I remember reading in the news when Cusumano testified in the recent Federal Antitrust suit, and I'm pretty sure it was because of the research that went into his book about Netscape--Competing on Internet Time.

"Thinking Beyond Lean is the only book that doesn't sound like it's about software, so maybe it's that one. But my gut tells me it's Killer Ap. I feel really strongly that was written by someone else. I have to take a guess. So I'm going to go with D-Killer Ap."

"You're gonna risk it on a guess? Remember, you didn't want to be in sales."

"I need the stock options, Alex. I'm going with D."

"You still have two lifelines, Tim. Do you want to use one now? Is D your final answer?"

"I have a feeling I'm gonna need those lifelines, Alex. I've been watching this show for weeks. D is my final answer."

Alex looked at his little blue card with the answer and frowned. Tim's face went blank. Alex's eyes met with his and then Alex brightened with a smile. "It's a good one! The answer is D - Killer Ap. You're now a manufacturing engineer."

A horn sounds.